5 Ways To Stop Doubting Yourself
“When are they going to realize I’m not capable? There are definitely a million things I can do better. Why can’t I just execute things as effortlessly as other people? I don’t have the energy. I’m a smart woman, but not enough.” Sound familiar? I think it’s safe to say that most women can relate to some of the thought patterns listed above. Why do we tend to shrink and hinder ourselves before we even give ourselves a chance?
The mind is a tricky thing. It’s always trying to make sure we don’t get hurt, physically and socially. The social part is where we sometimes fall into a pit of self-doubt. The mind doesn’t want us to make a fool out of ourselves, it’s a social risk. But is it? Is there a possibility that risk can be beneficial at times? Positive thoughts about yourself can literally change the outcome of your day, month, year, and even your entire life.
Notice your thoughts
At some point in your life, it’s likely that you were surrounded by all kinds of people. People with low self-esteem, nervous people who doubted every single thing, people who, unknowingly, influenced your mind and nervous system. That’s just the way we go through life as kids. Family, friends, teachers, places, and situations in your past took part in shaping your current self-talk. Your job as an adult is to take inventory of the thoughts floating around in your head and look at what you’d like to keep, and what you need to toss in order to grow. A great way to do this is writing a list of all the not-so-nice- beliefs you have about yourself, looking at them, and choosing which ones you’re keeping (I’m guessing none). Then write a wishlist of beliefs and thoughts that you would love to echo in your mind. This way you’ll help your brain get on board with the lovely new thoughts, kind of like introducing a new staff member to the team.
Show up for practice
Picture a boxing arena. One of the boxers, the negative one, is strong and muscular due to years of training, but the positive boxer is weak, hasn’t trained at all. Right now, the negative thoughts in your mind might be stronger than the positive. They’ve been training for years. They know what they’re talking about. That’s not a fair fight. It’s time for the positive boxer to show up for practice daily, enter the fighting ring and kick the negative boxer's butt. The practice is in your daily habits. While you’re brushing your teeth - try saying to yourself: “it’s amazing how capable I am”. When driving or walking to work, repeat to yourself “your name, why do you attract good things into your life so easily?” You get the point. Show up for your daily mind practice. Turn on some music and dance with the feeling of these powerful thoughts. Really welcome them.
Be around encouraging people
Ever heard of mirror neurons? It’s scientifically proven that our cells mirror the environment. It helps with adapting, but it also means that we can mirror people around us. Their attitude, patterns, mood, etc. Most of us have all sorts of people in our life, some spread joy, and others spread gossip, negativity, complaining, etc. It can be very effective to be aware of this and consciously choose with whom you spend most of your time. Collect individuals to your inner circle that inspires you to be a happy, grateful person and watch your life change.
Raise your vibration
We are all made out of cells and neurons. That’s a fact. Quantum physics shows us that all things in nature (including humans) are interconnected and vibrate at a certain frequency. You can raise this frequency and change your whole direction for the day. Dance, shake your body, laugh, breathe fresh air, drink water, pick a good feeling and fill your body with it by meditating on that particular feeling. Constantly confirm to yourself that you are the type of person that puts effort into good and intentional self-care. The intention is really something to look at. Before doing or saying things, ask yourself “what is my intention here? What is my desired outcome?” - sometimes the answer might surprise you. We all have days where we fall into autopilot mode and do things out of habit, that’s when the dusty old vibes resurface and try to take over your mood. The antidote to this dusty vibe is to intentionally raise the vibration of your body. It’s in your hands.
Assume greatness
So many of us know the feeling of assuming everything could go wrong, something is bound to happen that messes things up. You might even become used to it, expecting life to be difficult. The brain, cells, and neurons simply look at your thoughts and past experiences and create a perception your brain calls reality. After years and years of feeling inferior, most people don’t realize they can shift their whole thought process for the better. Granted, it takes some time and effort, but man oh man, life can be so magnificent if you let it. Now, these two life rules might come in handy when beginning this journey -
Repeat this phrase out loud to yourself multiple times a day: “Wow, everything is always working out in my favor. That’s amazing” and really let your body feel the emotion and excitement of what you’re saying. You could even sing it and do a little dance. Yes, life is FUN if you let it be.
Try to make at least one mistake every day. It might be a cliché, but that’s how you learn the most. Honestly. Progress is hidden in the rocky roads we walk through. Just learn to love the rocks and obstacles. They’re only there to show you how capable you are of creating an amazing life for yourself. Dance through the rocks and thank them for being there.
Life is a playground, and it is your birthright to play in it. Have fun!
Hi! I'm Sara, the founder of Withsara. I have been a fitness group instructor, Barre teacher and Yoga teacher for over 10 years. I am also a certified Nutritional Health Coach from IIN in New York, USA.
After giving birth to my two beautiful daughters, I have had to build up my body twice after my pregnancies. With my experience, I have created a workout that is a great combination of low impact, functional movement, pilates, barre, and yoga. It builds up deep core strength, creates sustainable and lasting change, relieves physical tension and mental stress, and gives you an overall healthier and happier body.
